Ah, school days. The stain of marker-dust on my fingers and clothes. The piles of signed disclosure documents to alphabetize and file. And... the whap of a hand slamming a volleyball into the floor?
I spent two hours after school today in the gym running offensive stats on the volleyball team. It is TOUGH. Seriously. (Moreso right now because of course the girls aren't wearing uniforms at practice, so there aren't numbers to go by, and I don't know all of their names very well yet.)
It just goes SO fast.
It seems like the sport that would be simple to stat for would be football-- there's so much more down time between plays. (Of course it doesn't help that during practice I'm actually keeping track of girls on both teams... and on top of that the coaches throw in "free balls" every other rally in order to make sure there isn't any wasted practice time.) (Normally during a game the server takes a bit of time to serve. The "free balls" make it so that those "thirty seconds" or so are only possible every *other* time someone ends a rally.)
I was just practicing today (normally the assistant coaches stat the practices), but the scary part is that there are actually a bunch of other things I'm supposed to be keeping track of at the same time! (But of course not for both teams, since in a real game all of our girls are on the same team.)
I downloaded the NCAA Volleyball Statistician's Manual over the weekend, and have been reading it. Luckily it includes different scenarios for all of the major stats. ("Blue-player-one attacks the ball, but white-player-one blocks it. If blue-player-two keeps the ball in play (off the block), this is NOT counted as a dig. It is merely a put-back, because it is played off the block, not the attack." Blue-player-one receives a zero-attack, white-player-one receives a solo-block.)
(The really scary thing is that I made that example up off the top of my head... yet I think it is totally valid.) (Which gives you the impression that I actually know what I'm doing... yet that is totally not true!!) I could probably pass a written test on it, but being good at "book learning" means nothing when the ball is flying back and forth ten times too fast for me to know which three people on a side just touched it or which side of the net it fell on. Additionally, if I look down for a second to award something to one player three other players do something before I look back up!
So basically, it is insane.
(And there is so much vocabulary to learn!)
(They say it gets easier with practice. We shall see!)
Despite everything I just wrote, I spent the *majority* of my day in my classroom teaching science. ;) (But I did volleyball practice more recently, which is why it's on my mind.) My classes look okay. Too big, of course. (35 students per period.) But okay otherwise.
My AP class is small (AGAIN) but I heard from two kids today who are (allegedly) transferring in at this point. We'll see how that goes. I think that would get us up to 25.
Last year only 10 kids ended up taking the exam. (BOOO!!)
But as usual I am sort of forced to be glad the others didn't take it, since they were completely unprepared. (Not that I didn't try to force them to prepare.)
In other school news, I had my beginning-of-year-interview with the principal this morning, and in addition to goals for myself, I gave him had five goals for the administrators. :)
The first one was "Go into a different student restroom each day (all the way into a stall-- not just to the sink area) and if it is not clean, take action!" Heh. (We have had a SERIOUS decline in school cleanliness the past two years. It is a source of frustration to me.
My last one was "Use spell-check. Proofread your emails before you hit send." He was definitely taken aback by that one. I told him that I wasn't insinuating that any particular admin is a common culprit, but that it is one of the things teachers talk about with great frustration. Even if it is an email only to people within the building... it is just embarrassing. We are in the business of education, after all. Let's try harder.
I also told him about the "Cursive Lisence" certificate one of my nieces received from a teacher last spring (and how frustrating it is to try to defend public education to family members in the face of that kind of thing).
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
Real Food
Inspired by Stephanie (The Crock-Pot Lady) I made chicken, brown rice, and broccoli "casserole" in the crockpot last Wednesday. (And then ate it for lunch and dinner the next two days.)
On Sunday I made an attempt at Stephanie's Sausage and Vegetables Medley and we had it for lunch after church. Although I made a couple rather bad mistakes (used two cans of chicken broth instead of only two cups; used relatively spice-free chicken & apple sausage, rather than the spicy kind that would have flavored everything else) it was still pretty good (albeit much more soup-like than intended). I ate two helpings, and the kids actually each ate a reasonable amount-- which was gratifying, even if I do think that was partly because I'm sort of a guest so they feel a bit more compelled to be nice than they would if someone else had cooked.
Since I have a lot of potatoes on hand right now (and I don't want them to attempt to grow baby potatoes in my kitchen) I decided to cook some of them tonight. On the drive home I decided it would be totally acceptable to cook some carrots along with them... and after they're all nice and soft, smash them all up (carrots included) and make a smashed-potato sort of dish. (Hey. I'm the only one who'll be eating it, and I say including smashed carrots is a perfectly charming idea.)
So that's cooking in some chicken broth in the kitchen. I'll post later about how it turns out... unless it is a dismal failure. ;)
(I'd promise a photo, but my camera is still lost.)
Meanwhile, this "cooking real food" trend has led to a dismal consequence: dirty dishes.
So I must go scrub some bowls and things.
On Sunday I made an attempt at Stephanie's Sausage and Vegetables Medley and we had it for lunch after church. Although I made a couple rather bad mistakes (used two cans of chicken broth instead of only two cups; used relatively spice-free chicken & apple sausage, rather than the spicy kind that would have flavored everything else) it was still pretty good (albeit much more soup-like than intended). I ate two helpings, and the kids actually each ate a reasonable amount-- which was gratifying, even if I do think that was partly because I'm sort of a guest so they feel a bit more compelled to be nice than they would if someone else had cooked.
Since I have a lot of potatoes on hand right now (and I don't want them to attempt to grow baby potatoes in my kitchen) I decided to cook some of them tonight. On the drive home I decided it would be totally acceptable to cook some carrots along with them... and after they're all nice and soft, smash them all up (carrots included) and make a smashed-potato sort of dish. (Hey. I'm the only one who'll be eating it, and I say including smashed carrots is a perfectly charming idea.)
So that's cooking in some chicken broth in the kitchen. I'll post later about how it turns out... unless it is a dismal failure. ;)
(I'd promise a photo, but my camera is still lost.)
Meanwhile, this "cooking real food" trend has led to a dismal consequence: dirty dishes.
So I must go scrub some bowls and things.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Do you have the time? (to listen to me whine...)
Some things that are annoying me, in no particular order:
On the plus side, my family had a lovely gathering over the weekend, my friend's baby is home from his surgery (which was totally successful, Yay!), I'm sitting directly under my A/C vent right now (Yay!), and I made real food for dinner-- and lots of it so that I can take it to work for lunch for the next few days.
- It's too bloody hot.
Yes, yes, I know it's cooling down. That's not the same as being cool. Also, it was 24.5 degrees at my desk today. (That's about 76 F for the folks out there who are metric resistant.) (May I remind you that since 1988 the metric system has been "the preferred system of weights and measures for [the] United States"? Its true. Make a personal goal to learn a metric measure other than the 2 liter bottle this year.)I can't be expected to be functional without better air conditioning.
- I can't find my camera. Seriously. I've looked at home. I've looked at work. I've looked in my car. I've looked at my sister's house. Where is it?
Is it hiding somewhere just to taunt me? is it actually lost in the sense of "You left it someplace idiotic, and you'll never see it again."? did someone take it? (Why would anyone do that? I was an early-adopter of the digital photography movement. My camera is not cool. It's kinda clunky. Not theft-worthy.)
- I am not sleeping at night. (Also, I'm not sleeping during the day.) This is problematic, and I am becoming tired and cranky.
Why can't I fall asleep??
- My head. It hurts. I have had three migraines in the last seven days. This is totally unacceptable. Partly because it makes it very difficult to accomplish things. Even moreso because it HURTS. Hurt isn't really even the right word. It incapacitates.
Those of you who haven't experienced the special joy that is migraines may not be able to fully appreciate this... but maybe you've had some other type of high-level non-intermittent pain? You know how it gets to the point that you can't really function on any level because you're so crabby... and because the pain itself makes you totally nauseated? Yeah. It's like that. Also, light and sound make it worse. So avoid anything that you might be able to see or hear. Good luck getting through work that way.
- There is something wrong with my tongue. No. Seriously. Shut up. I'm serious.
It... hurts? No. Aches. The back of it... Yeah, I don't know how to explain this so that it makes sense. It is as if I'd been talking for twenty hours without a break-- or perhaps chewing a wad of very hard gum for several hours. It's very odd. I'm wondering if this and the headaches could be related? TMJ? - Everything is getting so expensive. But we're all getting paid the exact same amount as before things started getting more expensive. To add insult to injury I heard a PSA on the radio a few days ago in which the governor reminded people that it is important to go out and buy lots of stuff because consumerism is the way to save the world. (Or something only slightly less lame.)
Dude. Be realistic, John. If you will start paying me more, I'll spend more, mmmkay? Otherwise, maybe you should find a math-savvy advisor to help you understand why I think spending more without earning more is not going to help me reach my financial goals. (As it is, I'm not going to be moving out of this apartment any time soon.)
- Allergies. They need to stop. The lady with the dozen cats moved out a week ago, so I don't know what is causing the current round of histamine-- grass? pollen? ragweed? who knows. But I know I don't like it much.
- My apartment is so messy. Granted, it's completely my own fault. Nevertheless, it annoys me. (Also, I couldn't end this list on #7... because seven is an ugly number. Odd. Prime. It just has all kinds of problems. If my throat wasn't so itchy I'd have just ended at 6, which is a totally acceptable number. (How can you dislike a number that is divisible by 2 and 3? You can't!))
On the plus side, my family had a lovely gathering over the weekend, my friend's baby is home from his surgery (which was totally successful, Yay!), I'm sitting directly under my A/C vent right now (Yay!), and I made real food for dinner-- and lots of it so that I can take it to work for lunch for the next few days.
So I'm thinking maybe it is just time to call a chiropractor or something... because if I could get the headaches to go away, I'd actually be in pretty good headspace. It is phenomenal how sustained pain can make everything start to seem rotten.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
It's Not Radical Anymore
On my way home today I passed a street corner where four teens were standing waiting for the crossing signal and I got a dash of 80s whiplash. Three of these kids looked like the average student of the past couple years... but "one of these kids [was] not like the others, one of these kids [was] not the same..."
(Time to pla-ay our game!? Oh, yeah! That was one of my favorite parts of Sesame Street. I like to relive it as often as possible.)
This young man was wearing a black muscle shirt and a pair of black and white checkered shorts that A.C. Slater would have celebrated in his first few years at Bayside. In an effort to protect my fragile mind I grasped wildly for a solution to the seeming time-warp-- of COURSE! These kids are on their way to a "retro" dance. At their high school which... couldn't possibly be in session yet on the 7th of August.
FAIL!
The warning lights began to go off in my time machine-- the flux capacitor was definitely fluxing as the stoplight changed and I crossed the intersection, but I still believed that with determination I could muster more than enough rationalization to banish this anomaly to the "Retro Dance" file... and then it happened. He moved away from the others, turned his face to the sun... and let the light glint off his hair gel and melt my brain.
This child had a "swoop" atop his forehead to rival Jon "Duckie" Cryer himself... and a party in the back that Achy Breaky Billy Ray would have admired.
This is not something you can create just for a theme dance, my friends. This young man actually committed (with his hair) to those forsaken style choices of the past. It almost makes a person want to pull over and start an intervention.
I know about the heartache of layered t-shirts and socks, kids. This is serious stuff. I know you think, "Oh, I'll just do a little side-ponytail for a laugh. It doesn't mean anything." But you're wrong. Soon you'll be looking in the mirror wondering why that ponytail has so little volume. You'll start teasing it out a bit just to improve the look, and from teasing to ratting is a slippery slope, my friends. Before you know it you'll be out $10 in contraband White Rain aerosol and you'll be agonizing over whether to go with the electric blue mascara that matches your plastic bracelets or the hot pink that matches your lipstick.
This young man was probably wearing ill-fitting jeans and distressed-graphic t-shirts two months ago, and some unscrupulous IZOD hustler managed to lure him down the day-glo path with a skateboard t-shirt or a pair of double-laced high-tops.
Watch out, America. Those "retro logo" t-shirts are a gateway trend. If we don't resist them I'm going to be faced with classrooms full of kids cracked-out on popped-collars and parachute pants, and I don't think I can face a world where Whitney tells me those children are the future.
(Time to pla-ay our game!? Oh, yeah! That was one of my favorite parts of Sesame Street. I like to relive it as often as possible.)
This young man was wearing a black muscle shirt and a pair of black and white checkered shorts that A.C. Slater would have celebrated in his first few years at Bayside. In an effort to protect my fragile mind I grasped wildly for a solution to the seeming time-warp-- of COURSE! These kids are on their way to a "retro" dance. At their high school which... couldn't possibly be in session yet on the 7th of August.
FAIL!
The warning lights began to go off in my time machine-- the flux capacitor was definitely fluxing as the stoplight changed and I crossed the intersection, but I still believed that with determination I could muster more than enough rationalization to banish this anomaly to the "Retro Dance" file... and then it happened. He moved away from the others, turned his face to the sun... and let the light glint off his hair gel and melt my brain.
This child had a "swoop" atop his forehead to rival Jon "Duckie" Cryer himself... and a party in the back that Achy Breaky Billy Ray would have admired.
This is not something you can create just for a theme dance, my friends. This young man actually committed (with his hair) to those forsaken style choices of the past. It almost makes a person want to pull over and start an intervention.
I know about the heartache of layered t-shirts and socks, kids. This is serious stuff. I know you think, "Oh, I'll just do a little side-ponytail for a laugh. It doesn't mean anything." But you're wrong. Soon you'll be looking in the mirror wondering why that ponytail has so little volume. You'll start teasing it out a bit just to improve the look, and from teasing to ratting is a slippery slope, my friends. Before you know it you'll be out $10 in contraband White Rain aerosol and you'll be agonizing over whether to go with the electric blue mascara that matches your plastic bracelets or the hot pink that matches your lipstick.
This young man was probably wearing ill-fitting jeans and distressed-graphic t-shirts two months ago, and some unscrupulous IZOD hustler managed to lure him down the day-glo path with a skateboard t-shirt or a pair of double-laced high-tops.
Watch out, America. Those "retro logo" t-shirts are a gateway trend. If we don't resist them I'm going to be faced with classrooms full of kids cracked-out on popped-collars and parachute pants, and I don't think I can face a world where Whitney tells me those children are the future.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
All about ME
For a brief moment I flirted with the title "I Wanna Talk About Me" for this post... but my love for quoting things was overpowered by my dislike of Toby Keith.
The way the "profile" sections are set up doesn't allow for side commentary, so I'm going to launch into commentary over here instead and leave naked, boring, unadorned lists in my profile just like the software wants.
Some of my favorite films (in no particular order and without commentary because that could take weeks-- besides, I'm sure I'll revisit this topic)
Favorite Movies?
Star Wars (Original Trilogy, Empire Strikes Back is my favorite "Episode.")
Casablanca
Lawrence of Arabia
Duck Soup
High Society
High Noon
The Winslow Boy
Henry V (1989)
What About Bob?
Searching for Bobby Fisher
The Godfather
The Happiest Millionaire
Clueless (Shut up. It's funny.)
Clue
Citizen Kane
Hercules (1997)
12 Angry Men (1957)
Wait Until Dark
Pride and Prejudice (any and all versions, but especially the 1995)
(And many others, but I haven't got all day to do this.) ;)
Favorite Music?
I sing along with the current pop and country in the car, but the stuff I buy is showtunes and 60s/70s.
Favorite Books?
In order from most mature reader to least...
The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas (pere)
Get the translation Robin Buss did in 2002 for Penguin. It is so worth it. I've read half a dozen different versions of this book (most of them multiple times), and this is by far the best English language version extant. (Don't even mention any film versions. I will cut you.)
The Lord of the Rings by JRR Tolkien
I will try to restrain myself here because I'm sure I'll rant about this at length at some later date...
If you've seen the movies and not read the book you are making a criminal mistake. Rectify it immediately, mmmkay? That is all.
Beauty by Robin McKinley
Yes, I know about Rose Daughter. It is a good book, and I know that McKinley has said it is the book she wished she could write the first time. I prefer Beauty, though-- I identify with the protagonist more (she's in love with books and reading) and I enjoy all of the allusions to classic literature. I also feel far better acquainted with the Beast in Beauty than in Rose Daughter.
I Want to Go Home! by Gordon Korman.
This book is genius. I know you think you're too grown up for it, but if you have the good fortune to come across a copy, try the first chapter before passing judgment. I re-read it about a week ago and it amused me so much that I was in a fabulous mood for the next two days. I'm thinking about putting a copy of it inside a "break glass in case of emergency" box on my wall. After all, how can life be less than great when you can read about Rudy Miller and how much he hates camp?
Liza Lou and the Yeller Belly Swamp by Mercer Mayer
A picture book with fun rhymes to memorize, accents to attempt, and incredibly detailed illustrations to accompany the intelligent heroine as she runs errands for her mama.
Drummer Hoff by Ed Emberly
If your picture-book-aged child likes rhythmic or repetitive stories, you're in for a LOT of "Again!!" requests with this one. :) We tracked it down years after I fell in love with it by calling the (amazing) elementary school librarian and saying, "It was rhyme-y, and there was a cannon... and at the end there was a page that was all reds... uhm. It was rhyme-y..." The sainted librarian knew exactly which book I was talking about. It's a very simple book, but it has real staying power. Rhyme-y!! :D
The way the "profile" sections are set up doesn't allow for side commentary, so I'm going to launch into commentary over here instead and leave naked, boring, unadorned lists in my profile just like the software wants.
Some of my favorite films (in no particular order and without commentary because that could take weeks-- besides, I'm sure I'll revisit this topic)
Favorite Movies?
Star Wars (Original Trilogy, Empire Strikes Back is my favorite "Episode.")
Casablanca
Lawrence of Arabia
Duck Soup
High Society
High Noon
The Winslow Boy
Henry V (1989)
What About Bob?
Searching for Bobby Fisher
The Godfather
The Happiest Millionaire
Clueless (Shut up. It's funny.)
Clue
Citizen Kane
Hercules (1997)
12 Angry Men (1957)
Wait Until Dark
Pride and Prejudice (any and all versions, but especially the 1995)
(And many others, but I haven't got all day to do this.) ;)
Favorite Music?
I sing along with the current pop and country in the car, but the stuff I buy is showtunes and 60s/70s.
Favorite Books?
In order from most mature reader to least...
The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas (pere)
Get the translation Robin Buss did in 2002 for Penguin. It is so worth it. I've read half a dozen different versions of this book (most of them multiple times), and this is by far the best English language version extant. (Don't even mention any film versions. I will cut you.)
The Lord of the Rings by JRR Tolkien
I will try to restrain myself here because I'm sure I'll rant about this at length at some later date...
If you've seen the movies and not read the book you are making a criminal mistake. Rectify it immediately, mmmkay? That is all.
Beauty by Robin McKinley
Yes, I know about Rose Daughter. It is a good book, and I know that McKinley has said it is the book she wished she could write the first time. I prefer Beauty, though-- I identify with the protagonist more (she's in love with books and reading) and I enjoy all of the allusions to classic literature. I also feel far better acquainted with the Beast in Beauty than in Rose Daughter.
I Want to Go Home! by Gordon Korman.
This book is genius. I know you think you're too grown up for it, but if you have the good fortune to come across a copy, try the first chapter before passing judgment. I re-read it about a week ago and it amused me so much that I was in a fabulous mood for the next two days. I'm thinking about putting a copy of it inside a "break glass in case of emergency" box on my wall. After all, how can life be less than great when you can read about Rudy Miller and how much he hates camp?
Liza Lou and the Yeller Belly Swamp by Mercer Mayer
A picture book with fun rhymes to memorize, accents to attempt, and incredibly detailed illustrations to accompany the intelligent heroine as she runs errands for her mama.
Drummer Hoff by Ed Emberly
If your picture-book-aged child likes rhythmic or repetitive stories, you're in for a LOT of "Again!!" requests with this one. :) We tracked it down years after I fell in love with it by calling the (amazing) elementary school librarian and saying, "It was rhyme-y, and there was a cannon... and at the end there was a page that was all reds... uhm. It was rhyme-y..." The sainted librarian knew exactly which book I was talking about. It's a very simple book, but it has real staying power. Rhyme-y!! :D
The Word You're Looking For...
... Is "Anyway..."
By way of explanation, the blog title/email address comes from the first episode of Friends
Lastly... I find myself wanting to shout this line at teenagers who say "anyways" or "anywho." Heaven knows I make my share of errors (some of which, I am a bit shamed to admit, are intentional) and I misuse the English language as atrociously as the next person, but for some reason I am particularly bothered by the non-word "anyways." If you are a linguist, please don't post a comment to remind us all that the English language is fluid and constantly changing, that usage evolves, that all words are in a state of flux and that the horrid "anyways" may well take over and someday leaving the 's' off the end of the word will be classified by dictionaries as archaic/colloquial. Let me save you time, my linguist friends. Don't post that comment, and don't write that email. I don't want to hear it.
No, my child. That is not a word. The word you're looking for is 'Anyway.'
By way of explanation, the blog title/email address comes from the first episode of Friends
MONICA: C'mon, you can't live off your parents your
whole life.
RACHEL: I know that. That's why I was getting married.
PHOEBE: Give her a break, it's hard being on your own
for the first time.
RACHEL: Thank you.
PHOEBE: You're welcome. I remember when I first came
to the city. I was fourteen. My mom had just killed
herself and my step-dad was back in prison... I got
here, and I didn't know anybody. And I ended up living
with this albino guy who was, like, cleaning windows
outside port authority, and then he killed himself,
and then I found aromatherapy. So believe me, I know
exactly how you feel.
(A PAUSE)
ROSS: The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'...
Lastly... I find myself wanting to shout this line at teenagers who say "anyways" or "anywho." Heaven knows I make my share of errors (some of which, I am a bit shamed to admit, are intentional) and I misuse the English language as atrociously as the next person, but for some reason I am particularly bothered by the non-word "anyways." If you are a linguist, please don't post a comment to remind us all that the English language is fluid and constantly changing, that usage evolves, that all words are in a state of flux and that the horrid "anyways" may well take over and someday leaving the 's' off the end of the word will be classified by dictionaries as archaic/colloquial. Let me save you time, my linguist friends. Don't post that comment, and don't write that email. I don't want to hear it.
No, my child. That is not a word. The word you're looking for is 'Anyway.'
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)